2 a.m.

its 2 a.m. and i'm sitting at my moms... I should go home but for some reason haven't been able to peel myself off this couch.. A lot on my mind I suppose.

for starters... I ran across a blog earlier, of a girl I went to school with who blogs about her recent diagnosis and trials with depression. It brought on a lot of feelings for me... some of annoyance, some of admiration, fear, a many others. Most of you probably are familiar with the fact that I was diagnosed with clinical depression almost 6 years ago. At first I was annoyed with this peer because I thought, wow talk about needing some attention, and that she was living up to the stereotype... then i had to admire her, for being willing to be so open about it... something I struggle with outside a special few people who I know I can trust, and then fear.... how could she be so open.. about something so personal? Maybe one day I will reach total acceptance of my diagnosis, and I will be ready to talk openly about it. Until then, surprise! I am clinically depressed. For now thats as much as I can admit.

much love,

xoxo -D